Ok so my mom said " you are totally stressing Anna". Ugh she is so right. I have paperwork for our change and I have to do a mile of things and the baby crys every single time I put her down unless she is asleep. *sigh* It never seems to stop.
I had to clean up this house and do any of you every get the feeling like no matter how hard you try its just not clean enough? Well that was totally me today. I finally had to say I used bleach on everything nothing could still be alive. And yes I know bad pagan uses bleach but with four kids and a husband you try to live without bleach. Just doesn't happen.
The Dr said the other day that Cecilia (my baby) was to small and needed formula and first foods. I feel like a failure that breast milk just wasn't enough. Just one more peice of mommy guilt.
Maybe I am being to hard on myself I just feel like there is so much to do and not enough time to do it.. Then I feel like I am not doing enough. Or I am doing it all wrong.
On the bright side. The sun is out in all its glory. I had to go sit in it just for a little bit. I felt a little better but then started along the list of to do and not done yet.
I feel like I am coming apart at the seems. Any advice anyone? Perhaps this was not the place to air it. But even if it was just to get it on the screen maybe it will help.. *sigh*

At least the sun is out.. Maybe thats my mantra?

So my husband got the job. We are so greatful but now comes the problem of having to move. Which I am greatful for as well but its becoming a bit harder to find the right place. Between that and my baby my day is consumed with family.
I just wanted to say I am still around and will check in from time to time. But if I do not respond right away or seem distant I am sorry I just have alot on my plate. I am sure after we move and I sync into my new enviroment all will be well. Thank you all... Blessings

Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Casserole

Many people are aware of the "kitchen witch," but fewer people are aware of the "kitchen ceremonial magician." This is due to the fact that kitchen ceremonial magic had been a secret tradition for decades. But the time for such secrecy is past, since kitchen ceremonial magic can play an important role in confronting everyday domestic problems. For example, suppose you are unexpectedly called upon to prepare a meal for others, but are unsure of your ability to cook. You will find it prudent to practice the time-honored ritual of kitchen ceremonial magic:

The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Casserole.

To prepare for this ritual, clear a space for the circle in the center of the kitchen. Then don your ceremonial apron and hold your ceremonial spatula in your right hand. Stand in the center of the circle and face East.

You are ready to begin. With your spatula, draw a banishing pentagram to the East. Then, thrust your spatula through the pentagram and say,

"Microwave dinners, be gone!"

Move to the South. Again, draw a banishing pentagram and thrust your spatula through it, and say,

"TV dinners, be gone!"

Move to the West. Draw the banishing pentagram and thrust your spatula through it, and say,

"Ramen instant noodles, be gone!"

Move to the North. Draw the banishing pentagram and thrust your spatula through it, and say,

"Mystery meat in a can, be gone!"

Move to the center of the circle and stand still. Chant the following:

"Before me, Martha Stewart.
Behind me, Betty Crocker.
To my right side, Julia Child.
To my left side, Martha Stewart, again!"

Visualize yourself standing in a giant casserole and proclaim,

"For about me bakes the casserole, and around me shines the 6-course meal."

Clap your hands three times and say,

"It's a good thing."

The rite is over. If the ritual is not effective, please order take-out ASAP!

 So she can crawl.. Only its backwards. No more are the days that I could let her lay on the bed and go to the restroom for two seconds. (Or even one second) She will crawl to the edge of the bed. But backwards. I have three older kids and never backwards.

Its so much fun to watch her crawl. She is my second true pagan baby. I left my church of birth after my oldest son was born and never looked back. She has a favorite chant that puts her right to sleep. I am having fun raising them in the Goddess tradition and learning right along with them. But most of all I am loving to watch her crawl. Backwards...